Aaaannnnd we're back, dear friends, and the reclamation of the old website reaches a fevered pitch as we gear up and countdown to the Grand Re-opening on October 31st, better known to some as Halloween, marking the 10th Anniversary of 3B Theater. And to whet your appetite, here's another batch of rehashed reviews for your reading or rereading pleasure. This time, we're going all crypto-zoo-illogical on you with a Bigfoot documentary, three separate samplings of Swamp-Gas from the Boggy Creek, and then, as far as I know, cinema's only attempt at a Bigfoot vs. Biker flick. Which segues us rather nicely into a bad batch of road-rash from a quartet of Outlaw Biker flicks featuring lycanthropic hooligans, Mean Joe Green, Vile-o-Meter breaking white-slavers, and the massacre to end all massacres up around Northville.
The Legend of Bigfoot :: Real or not, when Roger Patterson unveiled his captured footage of Bigfoot back in 1967, it created a voracious appetite for more proof that a lot of folks were willing to provide -- some more reputable than others. Read More...
The Legend of Boggy Creek :: When both the AP and UPI picked up a story about a family being attacked by a Bigfoot like swamp monster back in 1971, a national phenomenon was born, cemented by a local Texarkana entrepreneur who cashed in on the craze by giving birth to the Mockumentary. Read more...
Return to Boggy Creek :: A tale of a kinder and gentler Bayou Bigfoot, who gets his Gamera on by being the friend of all children, including a very young Dana Plato. Read More...
Boggy Creek II and the Legend Continues :: Charles B. Pierce returns to Fouke as a self-righteous turd cum college professor, who efforts to prove the existence of his own White Whale cum Skunk Ape -- if his students, a surly bumpkin, or any other locals don't kill him first. Read More...
Bigfoot :: I already mentioned the whole Bikers vs. Bigfoot thing, right? Right. Well, add Joi Lansing as the Bride of Bigfoot, the ageless John Carradine getting his Carl Denham on, and the production team that backed Coleman Francis. C'mon. What are you waiting for? Read on...
Werewolves on Wheels :: You'd think a movie with a title like that doesn't deliver a Werewolf on Wheels until the last ten minutes would be pretty damn awful, right? Well, you'd be wrong. Dead wrong. Don't believe me? Read on...
The Black Six :: The whole "reason der fart" of this movie is to showcase six NFL greats as action heroes. And as action heroes, these six guys are, well, pretty good NFL players. So basically, after further review, we have a False Start. On the Offense. Off-sides. Defense. Penalties offset. Repeat the down, and nobody wins. Read on...
Savage Abduction :: In the waning days of the Outlaw Biker flick, the Bikers, like the Frankenstein Monster of old, were nothing more than prop to add some punch. Here, the punch is on us as some degenerate blackmails an attorney into coercing a biker gang into kidnapping his next victims. Convoluted? You bet. And awful. And vile. And awfully vile. Read on if you have the stomach for it...
Northville Cemetery Massacre :: Although an argument could be made on where the Outlaw Biker flick began, almost everyone agrees that the genre officially died with this film. But unlike most genres, it did not go out with a whimper but a most spectacular BANG. Now Fly Your Freak Flag High and Read on...
And we'll wrap this up with the spotlight review on one of my favorite flicks from the late 1970's, Piranha, where Roger Corman finally decided to rip-off JAWS by beating JAWS 2 into the theaters with this tale of freshwater scares, courtesy of Joe Dante, John Sayles, Phil Tippet, Rob Bottin, and Jon Davidson. And not to beat a dead horse, but I really, really, really wish all those guys would team up again and make another, good-old-fashioned monster movie. Read on...
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