Favorites :: Mags and Slicks : EERIE #81

Artist: Frank Frazetta

Favorites :: Behind the Scenes : The Haunted Strangler & Fiend Without a Face

Lobby displays for the premier of The Haunted Strangler

and Fiend Without a Face double-bill at the
Rialto Theater, Times Square, NYNY. (1958)
(Images courtesy of Criterion's Fiend Without a Face DVD.)

YouTube Finds :: Fredric Hobbs' "Alabama's Ghost" (1973)

Okay imagine, if you will, an evening of fine dining on the likes of William Witney's Darktown Strutters, Alexander Jodorowsky's The Holy Mountain, José Mojica Marins At Midnight I'll Take Your Soul, Elia Kazan's A Face in the Crowd, Robert Downey Sr.'s Greaser Palace, and cap it off with Russ Meyer's Beyond the Valley of the Dolls. Now cut to the next morning, after a full night's digestion, and picture the resulting surreal and technicolor stool sample that kinda meal is bound to produce -- or, you could save yourselves the trouble and just watch Fredric Hobbs' (Roseland, Godmonster of Indian Flats) absolutely demented, nay, completely fucked-in-the-head -- and sadly, long out of print -- Alabama's Ghost instead, courtesy of Miqel.com's channel on YouTube.

Rehashed Reviews :: The All Yuks Edition!

As I hammer through all these old reviews I came to a startling revelation: of all the genres that I've snockered myself through over the years the one that was represented the least were [intentional] comedies, which made that an easy choice to tackle next since there were only, like, four of them...

First up, we head to a parallel universe where the 1970's oil-embargo and gas-grunch never abated. And now, with the United States up to it's eye-balls in debt, the President launches a desperate, month long televised telethon to save this once great nation from defaulting to its creditors. God bless the Americathon...

Next, we break off a whole chunk of Meatloaf with a huge side-helping of corn when the world's greatest Roadie bites off more than he can chew when his groupie-addled-girlfriend is more interested in his clients than him.

Then, we have midgets, spies, midget spies, and Princess Leia in her underwear. Hell, what's not to love in the farcical flick Under the Rainbow. Unless,of course, you don't like short jokes, ethnic buffoonery, and are a card carrying member of the ASPCA. If so, you might want to look somewhere over the rainbow instead.

And last, but surely not least, we have, hands down, the funniest spoof to come out of the 1980's that didn't have the name Brooks, Zucker or Abrams anywhere in the credits -- but wait until you see who is lurking in the cast. As the old saying goes, When Nature Calls you gotta go...

Are You Ready for Freddy? Eh, Not Really...

Damnable though it may be, I could go on and give faint praise to the new Nightmare on Elm Street by saying it was better than Platinum Dunes' other reboot and reclamation project down the road at Crystal Lake last year. I could tell you that even though the latest (and deserved) Hollywood golden boy/retread Jackie Earle Hailey is fine as the cursed child-molester turned homicidal sleepy-time deterrent he still can't hold a candle to Robert Englund's take on the same. I could even tell you that the film had some extremely effective bête noire set-pieces -- a favorite being when heroine Nancy (Rooney Mara) flees down a hallway that slowly liquidates underneath her, but ultimately blows its own foot off by being content with recreating several cherry-picked kills and nocturnal-night-terror sequences from the original run that constantly distracts from the narrative and derails the film's momentum to play a bloated lip-service to the fan-base. Yeah, the film had some interesting ideas on the Krueger mythos, and while exploring that virgin area of the sandbox you have a serviceable fright flick that you probably won't hate but one that probably won't crack your top 100 (-- 1000, 10,000?) anytime soon either. But when it ventures into the familiar end of the box be wary of the usual sand-burrs and cat-turds buried therein, especially when they expect you to eat them.

Sure, I could say all of that but what struck me the most during my matinee screening of Nightmare on Elm Street, alone in an otherwise empty theater, was the internal monologue going on inside my head during the climax, when once more our heroine is on the run and takes refuge in a closet. And as our perspective switches from either side of the slated door, a troll in my head keep squealing that Freddy was going to magically appear inside with her, where she thinks she's safe, when the director finally gets tired of milking the moment. Just wait. He's gonna be there. Wait for it. Wait for it ... Frankly, I'm tired of that voice -- let's call him Mr. Pickles -- that has seen way too many of these damned things and likes to calibrate and impatiently predict what most likely will happen next and not just let the damn film happen. And, sure enough, when Freddy popped inside the closet and said boo Mr. Pickles sounded-off triumphant. To which a new voice (and boy, is it get crowded in there) told him to shut the hell up; the rest of us are trying to watch the movie.

Take that, Mr. Pickles!

Favorites :: Vintage VHS : The Devil You Say.

Courtesy of Coverbrowser.com

A Soldier's Tale :: A Beer-Gut Reaction to To Hell and Back (1955)

___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___

"Into the air, Junior Birdmen. Into the air, Boy Scouts, too. Into the air, Junior Birdmen, and keep your nose up in the blue. And when they make that presentation, and pin on those wings of tin. You, too, can be a Junior Birdman if you send your box-tops in..." 

___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___  ___

To start with: Audie Murphy Audie Murphy and Audie Murphy -- Audie Murphy Audie Murphy. Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy, but Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy. Well, Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy (-- Audie Murphy Audie Murphy). Audie Murphy? Because Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy and Audie Murphy. Audie Murphy, Audie Murphy Audie Murphy ... Audie Murphy Audie Murphy: Audie Murphy Audie, and then Murphy Audie! But, Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy -- Audie Murphy Audie Murphy -- Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy!

Of course, Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy, Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy. Ergo, Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy; Audie Murphy Audie Murphy, Audie Murphy Audie Murphy. Audie Murphy Audie Murphy, and Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy, but Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy. Then, Audie Murphy Audie Murphy; Audie Murphy Audie Murphy, Audie Murphy and Audie Murphy.

Meanwhile, Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy; Audie Murphy, Audie Murphy, as Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy. Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy (-- Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie), but Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy. Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy; Audie Murphy Audie Murphy, Audie Murphy Audie Murphy, Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy!

Because Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie. Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy CinemaScope Audie Murphy Audie. Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy -- Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy Audie Murphy.

In conclusion: Audie F@ckin' Murphy.

Other Points of Interest:

Newspaper ads for To Hell and Back at the Morgue. 

To Hell and Back (1955) Universal International Pictures :: Universal Pictures / P: Aaron Rosenberg / D: Jesse Hibbs / W: Gil Doud, Audie Murphy (autobiography) / C: Maury Gertsman / E: Edward Curtiss / M: Irving Gertz, William Lava, Henry Mancini, Lou Maury / S: Audie Murphy, Marshall Thompson, Charles Drake, Jack Kelly, Paul Picerni, David Janssen

Favorites :: Pulp Covers : Hollywood Whodunits.

ACE Books (1970)

Favorites :: Inks and Paint : Frazetta

Frank Frazetta :: 1928-2010
(Seriously, @#%* you, Death.)

Favorites :: Ensemble Casts : The Men of the 12th.

And together, they all made a show called...

A few favorite episodes:

The Ghost

Hash

Hostage

Werewolf

The first four seasons of Barney Miler
are available for streaming at Hulu.

Favorites :: Comic Book Covers : Groo the Wanderer #15

Artist: Sergio Aragonés

Favorites :: Soundtracks : John Williams "The March from 1941."

"I Don't think you're gonna hit him, Ward."
(Gets me every, damn, time.)